As I write this, I’m well into my third trimester at almost 36 weeks. My c-section is scheduled for next week so I thought it would be the perfect time for a third trimester update. Read why I have to have a c-section here.

This pregnancy has been different from my first in so many ways. When I got pregnant with Everett, I had a miscarriage six months prior. I was terrified of miscarrying again. I ran to the bathroom constantly to make sure I wasn’t spotting, which is how my miscarriage started. I bled for two weeks before miscarrying. It was torture.

When I started spotting with Everett, I was convinced I was having a miscarriage. I was devastated. I cried hysterically. I felt gutted and terrified, like I’d never be able to have a child. But the cause of the bleeding was never identified, and I continued to spot off and on despite my ultrasounds looking normal.

With this pregnancy, I just felt different. Even looking back from the time I got pregnant , I feel like my hormones were all over the place. Even before I knew I was pregnant, I started having some anxiety that varied from mild to panic. Looking back, I didn’t know I was pregnant. I didn’t know why I was having any anxiety at all, but I now wonder if it had to do with my fluctuating hormones.

I also think a lot of the anxiety I’ve experienced this pregnancy just has to do with having to have a c-section. I’ve never wanted surgery, I’ve always been terrified of it. I have always been terrified of a c-section. This is why I had planned a home birth and to work with midwives for my first.

And a week from today exactly (as I write this), I’m getting a c-section. My first was so traumatic and it’s a lot. And that’s okay. I’m trying to be patient and understanding with myself and not give myself a hard time for feeling nervous and scared. I think that’s normal.

ON TO THE GOOD STUFF.

When I think about having our son, I’m so excited. I’m scared about the surgery, but I can’t wait to meet this little boy. I am so excited to grow into a family of four. I picture being home after the c-section, taking slow walks up the street to get dinner with our boys. I picture us walking to the library, cuddling, getting to know our new family member. I picture Everett with the new baby and it makes my heart melt. I’m so excited to be a boy mom and watch these sons of mine grow.

WEIGHT GAIN

I’ve gained twenty pounds so far. I’m surprised I haven’t gained more to be honest. I’ve been drenching my food in butter and olive oil, eating whenever I’m hungry and focusing on good, nutrient dense food.

That being said, I’ve avoided sugar for the most part. I’ve recently started eating more honey and maple syrup and dark chocolate, but that’s it. I’ve kept my carbohydrates healthy – mostly potatoes. Which are my favorite. I eat next to no processed food.

I’m focusing on protein and healthy fats for the most part. Baby needs both to thrive, with a low to moderate amount of carbohydrate. I’m not counting my macros, I’m just focusing on whole, unprocessed, nutrient dense food. And then topping it with butter, olive oil and sea salt.

CRAVINGS

I haven’t had many cravings this pregnancy (excluding my first trimester when all I wanted was sugar). In the past week or two I’ve craved Siggi’s yogurt like crazy. And while I normally limit cow dairy in my diet, I’m listening to my body and eating it.

I’ve found sheep’s milk yogurt at Whole Foods and have switched to that because I love it. It’s thick and creamy and I add vanilla and manuka honey. I feel good eating this and I figure something in my body or my baby must need it, so I’m not limiting my yogurt. I eat two a day sometimes.

I’ve also been eating dark chocolate, not a ton, but a few bites here and there. I normally don’t care about chocolate but it’s been really good!

The other thing I’ve been craving toward the end of this pregnancy – a glass of wine or a spicy margarita! I’ve been fine with not drinking, especially over winter. But not that it’s summer and there’s a new organic Mexican restaurant near my house, I just want to try their margaritas!

WORKOUTS

I was working out up until June but then we spent a week in LA and a week in Folly Beach. I worked out a few times in July – and by working out I mean doing Yogasculpt, which is a yoga class with weights and cardio. It’s an amazing workout.

Now, I’ve been focusing on sleep and walking. I sleep from 9:30-5:15ish. I walk all over the place with my son and husband, at least a mile a day.

STRETCH MARKS

I was always told and always heard that stretch marks are genetic. This honestly scared me because my mother had the worst stretch marks I’ve ever seen. They stretched from the center of her low back all the way to the front of her stomach, and covered her entire stomach.

They were deep, large rips in her skin. I’ve honestly never seen worse stretch marks – ever. I remember that she hated them.

I thought there was a good chance I’d have severe stretch marks as well, but at 36 weeks, I don’t have a single one. I have some ideas as to why this is.

First, I’m eating really well. I’m focusing on healthy fats which are absolutely necessary to skin elasticity.

Second, I’m eating collagen every single day, at least once. Collagen is the most abundant protein in the body. As we age, we lose collagen and it’s responsible for the elasticity of the skin.

Third, I’ve been using my body butter religiously. Many of you know I started my own skincare line and I make a lavender body butter that has so many ingredients that improve the elasticity of the skin and deeply moisturize. I started to get a few stretch marks on my right side when I was in my first trimester. I started using this body butter everyday and so far – nothin’.

OVERALL

I’m so excited to be having this baby next week. I think one of the hardest things with pregnancy is that your body really isn’t your own. And that’s amazing and so cool, but it can also be stressful and uncomfortable. Now that the end of this pregnancy is so close, I’m just so excited.

I feel so whole and happy when I think about having my son. I’m just so excited to meet him and grow into a family of four. I’m so excited to have my boys, and have my new son in my arms – safe and healthy. I’m so excited to introduce Everett to his brother and just spend time as a family.

I can’t wait!